EXCITING NEWS:

I started a PATREON to help me make more exciting and longer content for you with wondrous, disgusting rewards. Give me your money (pleeze)!!!

I was on FRENCH TV. (see me at 19:20)

My pet spider Gretchen is famous!!! Read an article about her on The Verge!!!

Hey, my Pinterest page, Hairy Chests I'd Like To Cry On, was recently featured on The Graham Norton Show!

myhomejpeg

Can I live with you?


            WHO ME AM?

Hello, me am Stacey Nightmare. I'm a vine comedian and a twitter personality. Yes, I am half crab. I'm also an ancient sea hag who can take many forms. Why do you fear me? I am very lonely. I want to live with you. Is that okay? Me promise behave!  Let me be your animal wife!

I can't help it, I'm crying. I'm literally crying right now as I write this, tears are streaming down my ruined face, sliding around some fat pockets on my dewlap and pooling in my weirdly concave breasts. I'm crying because if you are reading this, you are my boyfriend and I am finally coming to live with you.

I love you.